Building Successful Careers

The Hard Truth About Soft Skills: Workplace Lessons Smart People Wish They'd Learned Sooner (Paperback) Interesting book, a lot of tips and truth about corporate America culture. Easy reading. Elizabeth Xu

When I first came to the States, I was very lucky to know Pat and Lou. They helped me tremendously during my first few years in the United States. Lou was an extraordinary man, he was in his 80s when I met him in the early 1990s. Lou had taught at Stanford University, he also served as a Colonel in the US Air Force during World War II, Korea and Viet Nam. He was a great engineer and a successful business man. Lou devoted time and energy to mentoring and helping others throughout his life. I asked Lou one day: "Why do you spend so much time helping me and other people you have never met before?” Lou smiled back: "I help you because, you have a good heart, you work hard and you are very smart,  I believe that you can be more successful with my help.  You will help others to become more successful because of your good heart. I will not live that long to see your success, but it will become my legacy whether I see it or not.” Indeed, he didn’t live that long to see all ...

Many people ask me how I motivate myself. I respond, "How do you motivate others? Are you positive or critical?" Pat and I have talked about this topic many times. This morning, Pat just said in a very point blank way: “You need to love yourself!” Many high-achievers are extremely critical of themselves. They frequently beat themselves up for the most minor mishaps. They never feel they have done enough to make themselves and their families proud. Being introspective is not a bad thing, indeed, it helps you avoid being aloof and keeps you working harder towards your goals. Being overly critical of yourself however, plays an opposite role when you start to blame yourself for every unfortunate event in your life. It becomes a heavy load that drags you deeper and deeper into a sea of hopelessness and despair. You may spend all your efforts fighting the darkness and end up drowning in depression. Depression kills your spirit, creativity and dreams. Life without dreams a...

Recently, I spoke to the Association of Woman in Science (AWIS), a group of highly intelligent professional women. To my surprise, one member asked the question about glass ceiling that I didn't expect from this group of highly accomplished women. The young lady, a Ph.D. Student at Stanford asked me what I think about it and how I broke it. Some very accomplished women were raised by their families that they were less important than their brothers. They carry that concept with them, and accept unfair treatment and blame their gender for all their lost opportunities. Gradually, they fail to pursue their opportunities aggressively and eventually lose their drive to compete with men. Over the time, their glass ceiling becomes a concrete ceiling or a steel ceiling, totally blocking their vision, drive and opportunity of career advancement. They live with the resentment and bitterness of not having equal opportunities. My answer has always been, "The whatever ceiling first res...

What Got You Here Won't Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful (Hardcover) by Marshall Goldsmith (Author), Mark Reiter (Author) This book helps you to identify gaps between managers and executives, a easy reading. Enjoy.

My friend is an accomplished professional. She constantly deals with big clients. Recently, she worked on a complex business negotiation with her company's largest client. The client was very skillful in applying various negotiation skills including changing positions, escalating and blaming her for delays, renegotiating terms back and forth. She struggled through the long and unpleasant negotiation process. Finally, every party was satisfied and the deal was made. But she felt bruised inside and out. When we went to lunch to celebrate the success, she questioned if could she do better given the same case again in the future. "What's the most troublesome issue you faced?" I asked my puzzled friend. She lamented, "Communications with the client, internal business partners and my boss. Everything became convoluted, the client's negotiation techniques mixed with their hidden agenda. I was accused of being the defensive and making many excuses. Some information...

The world is an ever changing place and the pace of the change is accelerating. Holding on what we have, life style, working style, existing technology, communication style and etc is no longer realistic in this world. Our career or jobs will change at least 7 times in our lifetime. One of my friends called today and joked about the only people whose lives were not affected by this downturn in business are those on social security. I joked back, it won't be true for long when inflation hits the country. The choice is up to you: resist the change, accept the change, adapt to the change or embrace of the change. At end of the day, whether you are willing to change or not, your life is going to be different. How does one embrace the change? Positive attitude and ability to anticipate the trend enable you to embrace the change. Each week, free yourself from your daily busy work and schedule four+ hours for research and learning new things. Your research will quickly show y...